MASTODON || The Hunter v.s. ANTHRAX || Worship Music

Mastodon
The Hunter
Label: Reprise
Released on: September 27th, 2011
Grade: 5 out of 5 meatballs
Reviewed by: Pawl Schwartz

It took me a little while to jump on the Mastodon bandwagon. At first I just couldn’t tell what was special. I heard them worship the Melvins in interviews (I fucking love the Melvins), but I still didn’t hear that in the music. I was simply looking in the wrong place.

That being said, I kept Blood Mountain in my CD player for months (really) until I liked it. It starts with a single song, a single riff, then the magic grew from there. I think it was Brent Hinds’ voice that really threw me off. Something about it didn’t seem to match the music, like they were trying to pull something off rather than pulling it off.

If The Hunter was the first album I heard, I would have had no problem loving Mastodon. This album proves absolutely that this is one of those unicorn bands that is going to continue pumping out solid and original albums without falling into the trap of trying to imitate their own style. "Curl of the Burl" is the undeniable poster child of this album. If you like metal, you will love this song. The distortion on the main riff sounds different than any other on the album, deeper and more gritty, louder. The pre-chorus will have you thinking of queens of the stone age (didn’t expect that, huh?).

Mastodon has something that almost all metal bands lack: creativity and attention to detail. This comes through most obviously for me in the drums. Brann Dailor is the kind of ADHD musician that I admire. He can’t play one beat for one riff; he has to play every possible beat that could go with it, so that you hear the riff four different ways each time it plays. He even steps away from driving beats and double bass in favor of more loose, jazzy backbeats and syncopation. Don’t follow? Crank up Blasteroid for a perfect example.

I suppose that is the key appeal to Mastodon — when they play metal, they don’t come off as imitators of a style — they seem natural, in their element, playing with the musical ideas that come to them. As if to drive this point home, the riffs on The Hunter are double-barrel heavy, overkill as far as gaining new fans, like using a nuke on a cockroach. But when you use this approach in metal, you win.

My absolute favorite track on the album has to be "Octopus Has No Friends," the most progged-out and complicated on the album. It just feels so great to hear a band forge its own style and then write a riff that snakes around like a wild bolt of electricity, yet still rides the fence between over-complication and graspable simplicity. Also, with all the driving I’ve been doing back and forth between Chicago and my hometown lately, the chorus "I’m on my way back home" has become more and more appropriate and therefore stuck in my head.

Despite the fact that Mastodon is neither cracking the skye nor climbing blood mountain on this album, it still feels like a cohesive journey through some series of arduous, mystical tasks. I could fight a horde of laser-shooting, armor-wearing bears as long as The Hunter was blasting on the battlefield. What I mean to say is that losing the frame of a concept album has not left the band lost with a meandering feel; instead, Mastodon is ready to operate in any condition and never waver in their sound or creative reach. I hereby declare Mastodon to be the most innovative metal band at their level, warriors helping to save Metal from the pitfalls of self-imitation and kitsch. Which brings me to Anthrax…

Anthrax
Worship Music
Label: Megaforce Records
Released on: September 13th, 2011
Grade: 1 out of 5 meatballs
Review by: Pawl Schwartz

The only song that is worth a shit on this album is "Earth on Hell," which coincidently has the all-time worst title. The tightly-held guitar strings are struck so fast on the opening riff that they are just pure machine gun-punch, and the drums match in a crisp and clean way that only Charlie Benante can pull off (I would love to see him battle Dave Lombardo). The song sounds more like the old school thrash that Anthrax is supposed to represent than the rest of the album does. I also can’t get over the line "Coming to kick you to sleep," which for some reason impresses me with its encapsulation of the band’s mission. 

This album’s release right around the same time as The Hunter is kind of humiliating. The album is the sound of Anthrax trying way too hard and reaching way too far. Zombies? C’mon, that was the last Gwar album, and they are a joke band. Sounds to me like one of the riffs in the song is taken directly from that same Gwar album too. I really hate to hear people over the age of 45 stretching themselves this hard to try and regain some idea of “good” or lost glory. Anthrax was always last as far as top metal bands went (below Maiden, Talliker, and Slayer; I don’t include Megadeth just to make Dave Mustaine cry), mainly because they had the thrash metal sound, but zero image. There was nothing else to really hold on to or attach yourself to as a fan. They are even regarded as kind of goofy. I mean, shit, if I wanted to be really mean I could go ahead and blame them for rap-rock. Great idea guys, and thanks for Limp Bizkit!

I really wish that Anthrax would have just toured again instead of making another album. They sound like fools next to the innovative metal coming out today. I understand not wanting innovation in certain genres, but even on those terms, that brings the total of good songs on the album up to two. "I’m Alive" may make you giggle a little on the first listen, what with Joey Belladonna’s low register exercise on the chorus "I would love to be the demon / I would love to be the one / Heaven lives in everyone" coming off a little Creed-ish, but trust me, it will get stuck in your head.

Okay, now we come to the ultimate grievous sin. The secret track on the album is a cover of a famously uncoverable song by a little Swedish band named Refused. Yes, really. And to top it all off, the song is "New Noise." Is Anthrax trying to gain fans with this? To show that they are hip and with it? Or just trying to follow the steps of all-but-forgotten rap-rockers Crazy Town? Seriously, I prefer the Crazy Town cover to Anthrax’s, but mainly because their singer forgets the words halfway through and starts yelling SICK WITH IT instead. I have news for you Anthrax: You cannot scream, you do not have the motion to move to the new beat, and no one ever thought you were leading. What fucking band doesn’t know to stay away from Refused? This track needs to be aborted and shoved down the memory hole forever. This album should have been a 7”.